Patty Stephens came to the Farm of
Peace this weekend. Patty is a 30-year
veteran University Lecturer who specialized in Writing and Editing. I first met
Patty when she came to a 4-day Spiritual “Write to describe
the portrait and connection of the God of your understanding in your life.” Or put another way, “What is that Divinity in your
heart? And what connects you to that place in your heart?” Below is my response
to these questions.
Deep Dark
And so as I begin
to write I think, “I really need to drop inside and do some remembrance to get
more clarity on how to begin this piece.” And as I close my eyes I immediately
see that this very act is the answer to the question “What connects me to that
Divinity?” and so I begin to write.
Remembrance is
like a fishing line—I’m standing on the edge of a pond and throw my line into
deep water hoping to catch the Really Big One.
The bait on the line is my tender Heart, asking, seeking, waiting for a
response. A tasty morsel, this Heart--who
can refuse?
The line is His
name repeated in a deep, silent cadence, the heart’s yearning for
connection. And as I wait I feel a tug,
gentle at first but gradually getting stronger until there is a sudden surge of
connection and I know my Lord has heard my plea and has subsumed me into
Himself. But instead of pulling this
fish to the surface, I am pulled into the water, held close and shown all the
wonder and beauty that is His.
And who is
He? Is this Jesus, Muhammad, Allah? The
Name isn’t central to my experience although Allah is a very easy, comfortable
recitation. What is important is the
sense of a Knowing Presence, that something or someone is with me, is present,
is near, is loving, is understanding, is accepting and is completely
benevolent. This Holy Presence, whose name shall remain anonymous, is the
nearest thing to myself I can imagine—nearest and yet separate—a responder to
my prayer. I climb out of the water
knowing I am cared for, loved and safe.
So how do I know
this as I return to the world of fishing lines, lures, and other paraphernalia?
I know this because in that deep intimate connection there is something
else.
It is the Love that
I’ve encountered, the Love that loves me unconditionally and is no longer
separate. That love it turns out is myself. Not the self I thought but the self
He thought. His thought of me is His thought of Himself. And so, I am no longer separated, adrift or
alone. There is a loving center inside me that is both me and not me and I am
glad for that juxtaposition!
So fishing for
connection is how I connect, using His Holy Name to stir the resonance in the
deep dark inside, allowing that movement to begin and releases the mind
and heart from identification with other.
That Self, Being,
God, Who has called me to Himself from the moment of inception likes playing
hide and seek, “Let Me hide Myself in you and then seek Myself there.” And as I
come to know Him I am led to know myself. The God/Divinity I am attached to, the One in
my Heart is the very essence of me.
There is no separation except when I go fishing with my mind as bait.
Then who knows what old boot will get snagged on that line? So the work is remembering—always use my
heart as bait and never mind! Just hook it up and throw it in—hook, line and
sinker. The fishing was good today.
Landed a really big one!
Jamila Davies
November 7, 2015
November 7, 2015
